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Get You Some Business: Cease Playing Dime Store Psychologists

Written by on February 25, 2021

Story by Chuck Tackett

Get You Some Business: Cease Playing Dime Store Psychologists

Bill Maher, comic/activist – “You like kids and families? Great!! You do you. But for millions of others, getting a good night’s sleep, not sharing a remote, or changing a dirty diaper, never having a relationship talk, or listen to a passive-aggressive sigh – PRICELESS!!!”

Back when my 40ish nephew Joe was a toddler, he and I went out on errands. Like most toddlers his age, Joe was very inquisitive. One time at the store, he asked me one too many questions. I playfully answered him to “mind his own business.” Joe broke out in laughter which in turn cracked me up. This went on for about the next 15 minutes.

After some time had passed, we both forgot about it, or so I thought. This time, Uncle Chuck had to ask him a question. Joe couldn’t remember the phrase, “mind your own business,” so he replied, “get you some business.” This time it was Uncle Chuck that got amused.

As Joe grew up, even though he was too young to remember that incident, when I occasionally would bring it up, we both would get a good laugh. Little does Joe know that even after 40 years, his innocent childhood reply would become very much a part of his Uncle Chuck’s vernacular to this very day.

With all that said, at 65 years old, I still have no regrets about not getting married or having children. When I was younger, usually when a woman would ask me, my reply would be “because I am grown.” If that reply didn’t satisfy them, I would resort to my nephew’s remark of “get you some business.” Their response was usually that I am rude, and that is probably why I am not married. I knew their questions were a fishing expedition. They were trying to see if I was Gay, immature, or some other shortcoming I may have, that wouldn’t make me marriage material. What would tickle me, was that some of these same ladies would be sitting in the break rooms at work, complaining about their marriages and kids. I would think to myself, “Why would I want to put myself in a miserable situation like that? Is that all that I have to look forward to?” My thoughts would then turn to my LGBTQ brethren before me. Some of them did not have the luxury of choosing to be single. Some of them had to get married, have kids, to keep up the appearances of what society defined as normal at that time.

When it came to my LGBTQ brethren in more modern times, conversations about marriage and kids were non-existent. It wasn’t a reality at the time. Usually, it was limited to about having a lover. But in June 2015, all that changed when the Supreme Court ruled that same-sex marriage was legal in all 50 states. Now, my LGBTQ brethren wasn’t nosey like some of these heterosexual women I experienced. They were way more understanding of the fact that I preferred to be single. I had the mindset of Bill Maher, marriage and kids are not for me, but if that is your cup of tea, then boo, you do you. There was not this assumption that if I am alone, I must be an unhappy person. It is so refreshing to be around folks who don’t play dime-store psychologists in trying to figure me out, trying to figure out what’s my malfunction.

We may be alone, but we are not lonely. There is a big difference.

Chuck’s Chat operates under an open authority Opinions and comments are always welcome. Send them to soultrindancing@yhoo.com

 

 


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