SQUASHING PROGRESSIVE PURITY TEST SYNDROME

Written by on August 29, 2019

Story by Chuck Tackett

SQUASHING PROGRESSIVE PURITY TEST SYNDROME

I have been very frustrated with all these ideology purity tests that has been going around among Progressives especially with my Millennial sister and brothers. Let’s come to the conclusion that all human beings evolve over time and nobody is perfect. I’ve been wanting to write about this for the longest, but I just couldn’t find the right words to convey to you how I felt. Recently, activist and comic Bill Maher, in my opinion, expressed it perfectly on one of his recent HBO shows, “Real-Time.”

Mr. Maher articulated, “If the Democrats are going to continue to debate stuff that happened in the 1970s, they have to dress in ’70’s’ clothing. If we are going to talk about busing, do it right. Even though nobody under 55 knows what you are talking about, you may as well be debating denture cream.

But why bring it up at all? Does anyone really think that today’s helicopter parents would be into busing little Harper 90 minutes away to the poor side of town?

But this is the new trick in Democratic politics. Dig up something your opponent said decades ago that looks bad in today’s standards and pretend that is a mic drop evidence of your awesome moral superiority.

Kristen Gillibrand tried to pull some of that “woke Liberal” time machine bullshit on Joe Biden, calling out something he wrote 38 years ago about women working outside the home. For more details, visit the National Archives, it is on microfiche.

Liberals are funny. They believe in evolution, except when it comes to people. Kamala Harris was our Attorney General here in California in 2010, and I contributed to her campaign. I was disappointed when she opposed legalizing marijuana. Well, now she’s for it. That’s all that matters. We do not need to beat her up for 2010. That’s called learning. We used to want that in a leader.

Obama was against Gay marriage when he became President, as was most of the country. But then do you recall who got him to evolve? Joe Biden.

Humans evolve. You can be against Gender-inclusive bathrooms, and then one day change your mind because you have to take a wicked piss.

People need to stop pretending if they were alive back when they would not have been the same asshole like everybody else. YES, YOU WOULD. I know your parents told you you’re exceptional, but not to the point of being able to see the future.

You would have driven without seat belts, drank while you were pregnant, and hit your kids and your neighbor’s kids. They did that shit. Because woke sight is not 20/20. You don’t have ESPCP (Extra Sensory Politically Correct Perception).

If you were around in the 1980s, you would have worn those horrible dresses, the big shoulder pads. You would just have. You’re not Nostradamus.

If you were around in the 1780s, and if you were rich and White, you would have had slaves. The first Abolition Society in America was founded in 1775, and it had 24 members. 24 people in the whole country thought slavery was wrong, the year before we declared our independence.

Stop being surprised that we were dumber than we are now. The humans of tomorrow will be horrified by us. They won’t believe we used to sexualize people during sex.

Millennials seem to think they came along right as society met perfection. Do you really think future generations will look at what we’re doing: The man bun, the giant stupid ear stretching earrings and say, ‘that was the moment civilization peaked, we can do nothing more?.’  

You are not normally better than your grandparents. You just came later. You’re just the next upgrade. You’re the I phone.

Yeah, it’s funny, nobody has trouble grasping technological evolution. Nobody writing a love note with a quill said, ‘Why can’t I send a dick pic?’

Nobody in 1975 asked, ‘Why is my TV flat?’ ‘Where is my 8 track satellite radio?’ Nobody speaking in the Kleenex box that we had at first was mad because it wasn’t a smartphone yet?

Things get obsolete because we grow and improve, including us. Can we please stop pointing out people breaking rules that didn’t exist yet, and just grandfather in the shit you would have done if you were alive then?

I’m sorry Joe Biden had to get along with segregationists. When he first entered politics he had to get along with Aaron Burr.”

Chuck’s Chat operates under an open authority. Opinions and comments are always welcome. Send them to soultraindancing@yahoo.com


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